Tired.
I ran the bath until the hot turned cold, like I used to in my old bath tub, the one where I painted the sky on the ceiling.
I got in and sunk all the way down, until just my face was out of the water.
All I could see was nipples and knees, chipped toe nail polish that's much too dark for my pale feet.
All I could hear was the buzzing of the fan and my heart beat. When my ears started to throb, I knew it was time to lift my head out, but I just laid there.
buzzzzzzthumpthumpbuzzzzzzthumpthump
That's the only kind of quiet I've had in three weeks.